Visual Effects

Author : Josh Escobar

(Host) Welcome, tonight we have a very interesting guest with us. Please welcome [REDACTED].
(Clapping)
[REDACTED] Thank you, it’s great to be here. I’m a huge fan of the program.
(Host) The pleasure is all mine. For those who don’t know, please tell our audience what you do?
[REDACTED] I’m a Visual Effects Artist.
(Clapping)
(H) The unsung hero of the industry!
[R] Yeah, our best work is the stuff people don’t notice. Most of my friends think my job is all about wizbang effects. You know explosions, blood splatter, and all those exciting visual treats.
(Laughing?)
[R] I just laugh inside. Don’t take me wrong. I do work on those effects when needed, but what I get really excited about is my work on the small details.
(H) Can you explain that, because I love a good explosion?
[R] Yeah, no problem. Most people will not notice a half assed explosion, no offense, because it’s literally gone in a flash. However, people can tell right away when the small things are off. Take the human face. When the effect of a human face is done wrong, it doesn’t fool anyone. They can tell right away it’s fake. We call this unsettling effect “The Uncanny Valley”.
(H) Interesting, how then have you fixed this effect to work on set?
[R] Well better computers for one, but we study the human face a lot. Some of us even have participated in medical procedures where they peel back the skin observing the muscles and how they interact.
(Audience) EWW!
(H) I agree that’s a bit much….
[R] Sorry, research is messy.
(H) Moving on, what’s your biggest accomplishment?
[R] I’m most proud of my eye rendering. When done correctly they make all the difference between an ok face and a great one that can withstand minute scrutiny. You can tell the difference between my work and my colleagues when you see sunglasses, because in the amount of time they have they just can’t do the eyes right, so they hide them behind sunglasses. You see my colleagues work more in the bulk or rush jobs we get, while I get called in on the quality assignments, those that are going to be seen up close.
(H) We have a test for the Audience, can you spot the effects from the real ones?
(Murmuring)
(H) Well I can’t!
[R] Good, that’s when I know I’ve done my job right.
(Clapping)
(H) Well that’s fabulous. Are you working on something in particular right now?
[R] Its still hush-hush, so I can’t say anything. But, it will revolutionize our long term subtle affects.
(H) Great, would you run this clip of your latest mission through for us?
[R] This project was an up-close test of my eyes. Here we have a Salesman all in black, with a fedora no less, and he walks up to a suburban household briefcase in hand. As the door opens he takes off his sunglasses and puts on his best smile a twinkle in his eye. After his pitch and some idle chitchat with the homeowner, she invites the man inside to seal the deal….
The door locks….
She pulls the stun-gun out…
Ah, the surprise on the salesman’s face, classic! He never suspected she wasn’t human!
(Clapping)
(H) Wonderful just wonderful, and here is that Salesman! Fresh from the examination room.
(Salesman) Where am I? What have you done to me! Let me go you gray bug-eyed freaks!
(H) Stay tuned to The White Room as we explore and experiment on the anatomy of this human, live!