Author : John E. Geoffrey

It was at the time when the stars were right and a full moon stood over the desert, when a rose bloomed over the ruins of the ancient, nameless metropolis, the name of which had been banished and forgotten over the course of the millenia (but which once, a long time ago, in another eon entirely, had been called Vienna).

It was when a single drop of blood fell on the ground of the most central Ziggurat which had seen the sacrifices of millions in the long, empty millenia between the empires of the Humans.

It was then that the Devourer of Souls rose from the depths of Earth to demand his rightful place, to feast on the fears and terrors of the human scum that had taken over what should have been rightfully his, to devour the souls of each and ever…

“You and every damn fool who got himself trapped in this place, pal,” one of the hooded figures standing on top of the Ziggurat said, with the voice of someone who had heard speeches like this before.

“Silence, mortal!” the Devourer of Souls, the Drinker of Blood, Mangler of Spirits exclaimed.

He did not like to be interrupted. “I will be grateful! You have loosened the chains that have bound me for an eternity, for that I will kill you last! But don’t squander…!”

“The ‘kill you last’ routine,” said a second hooded figure to the first. “You owe me a drink.”

“Crap,” said the first. “I thought he’d have more style. Yo, big one!”

“WHAT?!” the devourer was getting more and more irritated by the scum that kept interrupting him.

“Stop right there.” said the hooded one again. “Let’s get some facts straight oh mystical one. Are we mortals?”

“What? You… oh.”

“Yeah, no mortals here right now. Second question: are there any humans left in the world?”

“Of course there… oh. What? But. Where is everybody?”

“About that: humanity managed to kill themselves a while ago. Never understood what they did but they just died like flies overnight.”

“I think it was more like a week.” said the second figure.

“Ok, maybe it was a week. Anyway it was damn fast.”

“Point is, everybody’s dead, Dave. I can call you Dave, can’t I?”

“Actually some of them kept around for years afterwards, just skulking and looting before the radition got to them.” his partner went on.

“Yes, but they didn’t seem to need any help getting rid of each other.”

The first one glared at the second before he addressed Dave, the Destroyer of Souls again.

“Anyway, they’re gone now. You’re out of a job. Question: do you have something to do now?”

“But… But I didn’t destroy anyone!”

“Yes, I know, you and me and a few hundred others. There are hundreds of destroyers of this and that around, ancient demons of whatever. None of them managed to get any destroying of humans done and all of them woke up a bit late. Blablabla. Anyway, more important question: Ever played any roleplaying games?”

There was a moment of stunned silence.

“What?”

“We are trying to get a Dungeons and Dragons group going but we need someone to play the cleric. Just say yes or no, we got another ancient god over in the Hungarian plains, but I think he was banished there before they invented writing, and that’d make it difficult.”

“Hmpf… Do you allow evil characters?”